Emotions shouldn't exist

-
I'm not supposed to feel like a useless crap feeling nothing but insecure, sad. Heish. Sumpah tak tenang kot hati ni I hate this feeling. See the picture above, and that's how I feel. The problem doesn't seems obvious, but this stupid  feeling ambushes you and just gradually kills you.

At times insecurities take over, my self-esteem breaks down, my heart just gives up, my head's not in one place, i just feel like dying but I know it's just 'one of those days' and things WILL get better and I will be happier cause I deserve too. Being a teenager sucks. It's all about appearance, expectations, pleasing people, drama, back stabbing, over thinking and so much more. I mean, you guys tahu lah kan what I mean? I'm sure only teens read my blog so you all know how suckish it is to be a teenager. Just please, can I skip highschool and move on with life?!

Mommy always say, 'What doesn't kill you, will make you stronger.' But mommy, what if it's killing you, slowly? I don't know. Sometimes I don't see the point of trying.

Whatever.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Return of the Furries.

-
Image
FURRIES.   Have you guys ever heard of furries? No? Well me neither... Until today. I used to think furries means fur, or furry, or something. I just found out that furries from Wikipedia point of view means;  Furry fandom  is a  fandom  for fictional  anthropomorphic  animal characters with human personalities and characteristics. From my point of view, furries simply means humans who love to dress up like animals. I used to think that idea was... weird. But now, I still think it's weird but in a good kind of way! It's unique and exquisite!  This is an example of a furry type. I've made some research and I saw many pictures of furries on plays. Did you know? Furries actually have a group? I googled it and they even have their own place to meet up for each state. That's just cool. A bunch of unique dressed people sitting together in room, just cool :B  Furry is like.. GAGA . Well I just have a thought that Lady Gaga got her bizarre ...
Read more

Post-uni life.

-
Hello folx and friends! It's been a while since my last post, and reading back, that was when I was still a student - and boy has lots changed. The past 3-4 months of my life has been the most uncertain and confusing moments of my life, but I'm glad that things are starting to look up now. Just in time... for 2020. First things first, I officially completed my degree in chem eng! Woohoo. Thinking back to when I first started, I had so many doubts in myself. But I was lucky to have been surrounded by supportive and ambitious people who push me and motivate me to not let my doubts get the best of me. Fast forward to my third year of university, I transferred to Australia! That transition in itself had such a big role in my life and its outcomes, and regardless of the bad days, I am so grateful for the experience it has taught me, and the woman it's made me today. A little about my life in Australia; I had my most severe depression episode while I was there - my counse...
Read more

The beginning of the last. It matters.

-
HAPPY FIRST OF DECEMBER EVERYONE! Wow, do I sound happy. Don't be deceived or anything, I'm not happy at all. Ugh, I wanted first of december to be happy and full of laughter and joy or anything NOT involving sadness, anger and disappointment. Why? On this day jugak, I have to feel all three of those? I mean, yes, I may not be in the position to deserve to be happy, but seriously life? ALL THREE OF THEM? Just shoot me already. "If masa pagi you dapat badluck, masa malam mesti good things akan happen to you" - Teera Oh girrrrlll, how I wish that was true. My day started out OK! No one spoke in the bus today, everyone so dismotivated or something, I DON'T KNOW -.-' We all slept in the bus and yes, basically no one takes the first of december as important as I do. Then, school was okay blablabla had issues with Iman and Sofi was sick so it was just me and Ameena. Maths was a pain in the ass. Scratch that. pain to the whole body! Coming home, I started to...
Read more