erratic.

Dear loved one, I have my utmost respect, love and care for you and I look up to you so much that every move you make is like a breath of fresh inspiration for me. You place a golden place in my heart, one that I swear will never ever be replaced by whomever nor whatever. Literally speaking, I can imagine myself willingly taking a bullet for you because if you die, the pain of having to live without you is more torturous than taking a bullet. But why... Why do you say these things to me? Why do you lower down my self-esteem so much and why do put out any ray of hope for me? Is it because you can't tell that I feel this way for you? Is it because you think I could do better in showing my emotions? You present yourself as someone with such intelligence yet when it comes to understanding someone you've known, taught and been with for what feels like a millennium - you fail, miserably. Listen. Please.. just... listen to my words. Listen to what I have to say and for once in

Hi everyone. I know it's been super long since I last posted. I got a bit busy with studies and got even busier after my igcse and now it's approximately the second week of summer and I've finally found some time to just sit down, waste time and ultimately, write. The past few months has gone by so quickly that I didn't manage to "be in the moment". I dont even know if that makes sense to some of you but what I'm basically trying to say is that everything went by incredibly quickly that when I wanna recollect my memories of the past, the events that happened seems to be shorter than what it really was. I was so stressed up and tired with studying a few months back and I dreamt and longed for the day I can bid goodbye to IGCSEs and now that it's officially done and over with, admittedly, I'm over the moon but at the same time, the feeling that I thought I'd experience was minimized and it kind of died down a bit, by day. Don't get me wr